Umbrellas

When it comes to most umbrellas, the bottom line is that they make everyone look stupid.  You walk around with a T-Rex arm holding it up and end up looking like a marine in those old commercials with their sword up by their face, except you just have a shitty umbrella.  And even worse, most umbrellas you see on a college campus are the tiniest things ever.  They cover about 3/4 of your body so that when you look at your left arm, you find that its covered with water.  It's impossible to stop if you're not a baby.  Don't even get me started on the hassle of walking by people with their umbrellas- they're always at poke-you-in-the-eye-height.

I hate when that happens

In Other News

Yesterday, California beat Japan in the Little League World Series. While it's great that America won it all, no one really cares about it. If you watched more than just "Little Kids, Big Drama," the obnoxiously named daily segment on Sportscenter, then I think you should strongly consider rethinking your life. Go America, I'm okay when I say I didn't watch a second of your victory.

I'd rather watch the Sandlot

Also, in other news, Hurricane Irene hit this weekend and for most of us, all we were hit with was a hurricane of Facebook status updates. This beckons a new Facebook etiquette post.

Finally, yesterday, ex-Giant, ex-Saints, wait, he's on the Panthers now? TE Jeremy Shockey saved a choking teammate this week by punching him in the back. Some rookie tried and failed to do the Heimlich so Shockey had to jump in.

One Last Attempt to Make Preseaon Football Relevant

Tonight there is a HUGE football game on. The two teams involved in the greatest rivalry in sports are meeting on the gridiron tonight to fight for glory. It is all on the line. Oh, and now I'm being told it is a bowl game....

This is all stupid. The latest attempt to make people care about preseason football is tonight when the Jets and Giants play in their newly named "MetLife" Stadium in another meaningless game. Don't buy the hype. It is still a meaningless game against two teams that are in no way real rivals. It is all stupid. The fact that they are starting to call this annual preseason game the MetLife Bowl, and will be playing for a trophy that probably looks like this is silly:

Preseason football doesn't matter. It is what it is, and if it were treated as such I would not have any problem with it. But the fact that ESPN and the NFL keep trying to make people think these games matter is just stupid. Almost as stupid as chugging tequila just because the song "You and Tequila" comes on. All in all bad ideas. Just like convincing us, and even feeding hype to the players that will no doubt get injured trying to play too hard in a meaningless game for an even more meaningless trophy, is a bad idea. I can wait two weeks for real football. I can wait a few months for when these two teams actually meet up in a meaningful December game. So please, spare me this hype.

Getting after it: Port Republic

This weekend I had the honor and the privelege of having my first ever Port Republic Premium American Brew. What makes Port Republic so great was that it was only $11.89 at Kroger and I believe it is sold exclusively there. The beer itself tastes like PBR, but really who fucking cares about that. I was able to drink beers that were slightly over 30 cents each and had amazing cover-art. Port Republic urges its drinkers to "Sail Close to the Wind", which literally makes no sense, but I enjoyed reading it on my beers. They are trying to be classy and its working, not like Miller "Jabroni" Highlife, which Donaghy Estates loves along with all other Miller Products. So if you find yourself at Kroger, why not buy the cheapest beer there and enjoy getting drunk on some fake classyness and a shitty product, because really that is what is important and life.

We're Back!

Regular posting will resume next Monday, August 29th

For whoever still reads this:

We are taking a summer hiatus, and will come back swinging in the fall and the start of the school year. Expect more posts and an active twitter, because apparantly thats the cool thing to do. But for now, its time for summer and not blogging, because this was only set up as a medium for us four writers to talk, but now we are all home, except for Coolpants.

Shut the Fuck UP: the people who put up annoying MLK statuses after Bin Laden's Death

No one cares about how political stances on facebook or twitter, you don't have to openly publicize it. And who do you think you are? Do you think you are better than everyone because you don't care that he died, and don't want to celebrate it? He is a mass murderer and deserves to be killed, do you put that as your status when someone is sentenced to the death penalty? atleast have some consistancy. Also as a person from the New York area, my friends, family, and I were all affected by the 9/11 attacks and if you are offended by people rejoicing Osama's death, you don't even fucking know him. But the best part of this whole situation is that these quotes were wrong. Someone made them up and added them to an existing MLK quote.CNN did a report on them, and this is also nothing against MLK, he was a great man and speaker, it is just pretensious people who think they are above celebrating the death of a man who has been apart of the death of thousands of Americans. So shut the fuck up.


http://www.cnn.com/2011/TECH/social.media/05/03/quotes.twain.mlk/index.html?hpt=T2

This is the Best

We fucking got him. And it wasn't just a drone strike. We went into Osama's compound, guns blazing, and took that motherfucker out. Even after the special forces lost a helicopter, they persevered and were in and out, finally killing public enemy number 1. They also blew up the helicopter to not leave any information for terrorists. This is the best news ever. The American military is the best there is, and if you're a terrorist, we will find you and we will kill you. No one fucks with America. Amen.

Never Forget all those who died on 9/11, especially the 343 members of the FDNY. Finally, some justice.

These Colors Don't Run

Video of the Week

In more of a somber tone after the death of Bin Laden, this video reminds us all of 9/11 and the people who died because of Osama. Fire and Rain is perfect for the moment, and this is an amazing performance